Oliver Twist from Oliver Twist
Katniss Everdeen from Catching fire
It was a quiet Monday morning Oliver was walking the street and he
was thinking to himself that he and one very important thing to do today
but he couldn’t think of what it was so he sat on a log and thought
very hard for about an hour and then it hit him. He had to go meet his
cousin at the train station. His aunt sent him a picture of her and she
had long black and had come in to great riches for she had won the
hunger games two times she had a huge house and was going to get married
to a man named Peeta and he won the games too. Oliver want to the to
the train station to pick her up and to find that her train was delayed
two hours and she was not going to be in his station until later
tonight. So Oliver walked along the streets for a little while longer
and he went back to the train station there he saw his cousin Katniss
Everdeen sitting on the bench outside the train station.
She
had even longer hair than in the picture and she had sort of tan skin
and she was so jumpy that she almost killed him when he tapped her
shoulder. She asked my name and asked with more of a demand voice and
she was pinning him on the train station floor. Oliver replied with a
gasp of air, “ my... name... is....oli..Oliver twist. I’m
your...cousin.” She stopped pinning oliver to the floor and helped him
up,” Sorry I didn’t know that you looked like so I thought you were
trying to kill me.” olive replied,” No problem just lets make it a
priority not to do that again okay??” ,” okay” said Katniss. Oliver took
katniss home and showed her around and to her room. They were really
tired so they went to sleep.
The
next morning they woke up and made breakfast Pancakes and bacon they
finished up and went for a walk around town and Oliver asked Katniss,”
Katniss What is the Hunger Games?” she responded,” The hunger games is
when 24 kids between the ages of 12 and 18 go into a televised arena and
have an epic battle to the death and one can win but me and Peeta
played a trick and we were both going to eat poison berries and they
took us both out of the arena.” we both looked at each other and we had a
little moment of silence and they were near the log where Oliver sat and
thought for about an hour to think of what he needed to do. After that
Katniss asked Oliver what his life was like and he replied by saying,”
Well I was an orphan and I was not given very much to eat so I asked for
more and I got yelled at very bad and then I was given to a grave
digger and a crook and a very nice family but now I’m grown up and I
live by myself and I live it here now I got away from foster families
and all that.” A couple weeks went by and Katniss went home and Oliver
went on with his life and before Katniss left he made a promise that he
would try to come and visit her next time.
I love how you told your story it really got me interested in it. NIce job libby:)
ReplyDelete1. I thought you did a real good job, after i read it i felt that you could really feel what was going on, and by the way i love the tittle. I remember all the action.The images i could see was how sad it was at the end of the story.The ideas that are in my head is how in the story they were cousins and katniss almost killed him. The story made me think about the hunger games and the movie and even the the books.
ReplyDelete2. The best aspect of the setting that i felt was best described when they meet and he described her. You used elements of strong description was when you introduced oliver."She stopped pinning oliver to the floor and helped him up,” Sorry I didn’t know that you looked like so I thought you were trying to kill me." i really liked this sentence because first of all it made me laugh and second of all how it really related to the characters.
3. This story seamed original and authentic. The details that made the characters more real was how you wrote it like if it really was them in the story. I think you need a nice job on the dialogue which made them seem more real.
4.I thought the story was very nice the only thing was that i consider putting in more commas but thats it other wise great job.
1.I thought that your story was very interesting to read and follow. After i finished reading it was was very impressed on how good it was.
ReplyDelete2.The line that i thought that stud out the most is "katniss what is the hunger games?" I liked that because i loved the book and i thought that it was a very good and interesting for the other character to realize what it is.
3.For the dialauge i think that for some of it that you could have gone more in deep with it.
4. I think that you had a couple of run on sentences. but other then that you did a good job.